More than ever before children between 5 and 19 have ongoing mental health issues. In fact, anxiety and depression has almost doubled in 15 years. Education and peer pressure, body image concerns and social media overload can contribute to a melting pot of stress…
Of course, there are natural, every day anxieties and challenges which young people need to accept and navigate. In fact, learning to bounce back then spring forward from life’s challenges is a skill every child needs as they head into adulthood. But where do you start?
How to build a resilient mindset
Give time. Our kids need nurturing. They need one-on-one time at home – without anything else taking this away from them. That means no distractions, no trying to chat while cooking the dinner or checking emails.
Just you and your son or daughter for a few unhurried minutes every day. This will teach your child that they have a safety net – which is always there without conditions – where they can open up.
Indeed, as tutors, we often play a crucial role in this where we are a supportive safety net, able to help a child through a learning maze.
Make mistakes. We live in such a sensitive bubble that schools sometimes even phone home to ask parents if they can give their child a plaster. Though any serious allergies are shared on school entry, of course, there is a fine line between being over-protective and trusting your instinct or encouraging risks.
Children need to learn that they have to take a risk to get on in life – that it is OK if they fail an exam, or do badly at a test. Why not share your own mistakes, so they realise that making them is the only way to learn?
Be positive. Kids often look at a situation from the ‘glass half-empty’ perspective. They might come home saying ‘I’m rubbish’ or ‘I lost the match…’ or ‘I’m stupid.’ Instead, help them to turn a negative into a positive.
So if your son or daughter says they are ‘rubbish’, counter this with, ‘No, you’re clever, funny, talented at…’ Nobody is brilliant at everything all of the time … EVER. Your positive language can go a long way in breaking down all the negative emotion which can hijack our children’s thoughts at times.
One to one help is worth its weight
Parents often tell us that we have reversed their child’s negative thinking, or had a life-changing effect. It’s always humbling… Working with children across Manchester and Cheshire for many years has given us an added insight into not only seeing how children tick, but also how to help.
Anyway, we will return to this topic as we have lots of other practical tips and wisdom to share. In the meantime, if your child needs some one on one subject support, you only need to get in touch…